I don’t want to talk about it.
I don’t need to talk about it.
Talking about it won’t change what happened.
How many times have you said these words to yourself or to others? Probably quite a bit. No one wants to face
difficult things and it is so much easier to just avoid. Because if you talk about it, you might:
never stop crying
have to acknowledge that it happened
relive all the memories again
But realistically, how often are you actively trying to avoid those things right now? How much energy are you putting in day to day to stay focused and present for your job, your family, your friends, your self?
The goal of going to therapy is not to relive your trauma. It is not to make you cry or to point out what you did wrong. The goal is for you to overcome what has happened.
Imagine going through your day without memories popping up out of nowhere. Imagine what would happen when a thought or feeling is triggered and you still feel in control. Imagine being able to accomplish all the things you would like to because what happened to you is not holding you back anymore.
These are the goals of therapy.
It’s scary talking to someone about your trauma. It might even be more frightening to you than the event itself. But avoiding it, only causes more pain (physical, mental, social, relational) in the long run.
Find a therapist you trust on a gut level and that you connect with. Don’t waste time, money, or energy talking to someone who isn’t helping you. After all, this is your life. Don’t you want it to be the best it can be?